Writer's Block: Don’t look back in anger

Do you have any regrets from this year?
I am currently sitting among family, and while I love my family, I am a bit lonely. I regret not making more of an effort to find that special woman. I regret that I still feel the need to hide a large part of my my life from my family becasue they will be embressed by me.

I Saw You Today

Dear L,

I saw you today. I know it was you because you did a double take when our eyes meet. You look beautiful. Pregnancy suits you. Your pregnancy also answers so many questions I might have had. It was good seeing you though. I wish you and your child nothing but the best. I know you will be a wonderful mother. Good bye.

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Entertaining A Child

A good Sunday night for me is a quite night at home with books in hand and maybe a marathon of shows I like on tv. Make the night the better getting some writing done. That is fine for me, I am 30 years old. For a 9 year old this is not a good night. This is a very bad boring night. So you can imagine how thrilled I was when the original plans to keep my 9 year old sister entertained where canceled and she just looked at me and said, "So what are we going to do tonight?" I love her but I hate the fact that I am the one making plans with/for her and at the last minute. Didn't I just finish telling her parents on Friday that I was tired of having her all the time and yet behold its Sunday and nothing has changed. I know it is not her fault but I just miss my freedom. Plus, I miss adult themes. So after playing with my budget (because I do not ask for nor do I accept cash for watching my sister) I have enough to take her to the movies tonight, Spy Kids 4. That is if I am able to convince her to skip watching it in 4D. Oh well.

Back to School Shopping

Currently I am out and about with my mother and 9 year old sister (soon to be 10). We, well really they, are doing back to school shopping. I am really just going and finding the desired sizes and offering an opinion when asked. It is while out with them that 2 things have been confirmed for me. One is that I will never be the person my mother wants me to be so I should stop trying to please her and gain her acceptance (easier said than done) and two I am NOT having kids! I can hear the world breathing a sigh of relief at the news. The reason I don't want any kids is because while they are great it is only for a short period of time. If I have to be with them 24/7 I can't stand them. I love my sister but god I would gladly leave in a heart beat. Sure I want her in my life but not in the capacity that I have her now. Which makes me wonder does this make me evil?

My Head Is Pounding!!!

My head is pounding and I don't know why. It has been hurting so much lately that I don't want to take pills for it, I have taken so many lately. I wonder what triggered the head ache this time? Real life is pain but nothing that I can't and haven't been handling. I thank god it seems to be getting easier, or at least I have been getting more breaks lately but still. Hopefully soon the head ache will disappear. Details another day when the screen isn't hurting me.

Spirit Day

Originally posted by neo_prodigy at Spirit Day

It’s been decided. On October 20th, 2010, we will wear purple in honor of the 6 gay boys who committed suicide in recent weeks/months due to homophobic abuse in their homes at at their schools. Purple represents Spirit on the LGBTQ flag and that’s exactly what we’d like all of you to have with you: spirit. Please know that times will get better and that you will meet people who will love you and respect you for who you are, no matter your sexuality. Please wear purple on October 20th. Tell your friends, family, co-workers, neighbors and schools.

RIP Tyler Clementi, Seth Walsh (top)
RIP Justin Aaberg, Raymond Chase (middle)
RIP Asher Brown and Billy Lucas. (bottom)

REBLOG to spread a message of love, unity and peace.

I'm tired and feel very..............

I have just come off a weekend where a headache on Saturday afternoon knocked me out for the rest of the day. Sleep, dark room, little to no noise, and two advil's where needed to get rid of said headache but woke up on Sunday feeling very out of it, plus loud noise still hurt. That was bad but on the good side I was able to juggle to jobs last week. Okay I called in sick to my first job while I trained with the Census. Bigger picture, multi tasking skills are being sharpened. Yay.

I just saw the season finally of Damages. I liked it. I think. I will have to watch it again to greater apprecitate it but I liked it. Sorry I have a saying the bigger the b**ch the bigger the crush. So I love the Patty Hughes character. Though the Ellen character is starting to show promise and the fact that the show lends its self to fem subtext is big for me. Night.
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    news in the background

Me bored!!

Currently working for big bother and am so bored!!! I want to say more but they stressed privacy, confidentiality, and anonymity so much (along with title 13 this and title 13 that) that I don't want to push my luck writing more about it. I am working with paperwork its not like its the fantasy spy life (I wish) but hey its a job. Oops better go my boss is trying to give me an evil look for typing on my cell and being so open about it.
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    office background noise

Update on Lust and Life

Life in general is good. My baby sister (an eight year old) was stung by a bee but after a trip to the doctors and a shot later she was perfect. My baby niece (two months old) is healthy and growing bigger every day. My sister and her husband are good. Some drama at my sister's birthday bash between some of the guest but that just help lead to a memorable night. My girls are good. Lust is finally over. The object of my lust is now married. There is something about a ring that just takes away someones sensuality. My the beautiful bride and her husband have a long loving happy life together. (I really am good I drank the lust out of my system awhile ago.)
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    news in the back